"No one is to blame for the deficit, but we have spent more than we earned". With this astonishing statement about the 8.51% public deficit, Elena Valenciano said a few days ago. Was the PSOE's issue two serious? It seems so. The superficiality of these words, bordering on childishness, sends shivers down the spine.

In a certain sense we could agree with Valenciano: nobody is to blame, because we are all to blame. The Spanish debt is, in fact, fourfold: of the State -central administration, autonomous regions, city councils-, financial institutions, companies and households. The total amount is four times the GDP. Both the government that spent on pharaonic works of dubious utility and the family that paid for its vacations with credit have lived beyond their means. Faced with such widespread guilt, in the end no one should feel particularly guilty manager. Understandable reaction, but typical of foolish people.

The elimination of the annoying concept of guilt is not exclusive to the political sphere. It can also be observed, for example, in family life. In various Western countries - not in Spain - the increase in the number of divorces and breakups is viewed with concern. issue . Apart from ideological debates on the status of the family, there is a formidable public health issue here challenge , since the effects of this family breakdown are devastating, both for spouses, children and grandparents, and for society in general. Half a century ago, the elimination of the "guilty divorce" was a decisive milestone in Western legislation. Now, family breakdown has come to be regarded as a kind of technical accident, for which no one feels manager: - "Love is over, just like that." -I don't feel anything anymore. -We have found that irreconcilable differences make living together unviable". In the end, it seems that everything is a matter of hormones, or of ineluctable destiny. Will and reason have nothing to say.

From "divorce without fault" to "divorce without cause". Both marriage and its dissolution acquire the character of a simple episode, in the sense of Milan Kundera: neither the inevitable consequence of a preceding action, nor the cause of what follows. Spain has once again played a pioneering role in this field with the introduction of "express divorce". In the words of the then Vice-President Fernández de la Vega, "nobody should be asked why they separate". The vice-president was not alone in this assessment: - "Has the government done anything right?", El País asked María Dolores de Cospedal, PP candidate for the presidency of Castilla-La Mancha, in 2006. There is a law that I like: what they call express divorce", was Cospedal's answer.

On a more anecdotal level, I remember my time as a student and I compare it with the present. When on occasion we didn't want to study or go to class, we would simply say: "I don't feel like studying, I don't feel like going to class". What do today's students say at the same status ? -I don't feel motivated. As if motivation were a kind of cosmic radiation, independent of our will and coming to us from outside. If it is lacking, we will have to resort to technical remedies - pills, therapy, coaching - or a change of center educational. The need to have an impact on one's own self is rarely considered: that is scary, it is easier to look outside.

All of us, individual and social actors, tend to attribute the blame for our misfortunes to external circumstances. It is always others who are responsible: the financial markets; Merkel; the rating agencies; the government or civil service examination; the other spouse, the children, the parents; the system educational; at the rate we are going, the drought will soon be too.

This is not a good strategy. Apart from the fact that it does not work, it deprives us of one of the most liberating and enriching experiences: the sequence of recognizing one's mistakes, repenting - and, if necessary, asking for forgiveness - and starting again after correcting one's course. If the gift of forgiveness among humans already relieves our conscience, reconciliation with God regenerates us completely. It is a matter, at final, of basing our life on truth. Acceptance of reality is a prerequisite for a successful existence.