Peter Pan, the fictional character created by James M. Barrie in 1904, was a boy who refused to grow up. He decided to remain a child in "Neverland". That stance came a century ahead of what is happening now: the proliferation of adolescents with "regressive rebellion". It is the civil service examination to the "unbearable turkey age" to mentally return to the rewarding childhood.

Peter Pan had a happy childhood and did not want to risk losing it. He was afraid of growing up. Despite this unpresentable attitude, he was considered a hero for going against the tide and for his original and quixotic rebelliousness in the face of the tragedy of the passing of time. He was mainly read by those who were distressed by each new birthday; for them, reading him was almost a therapy.

When did the demystification of the hero begin? In 1966, when the American psychiatrist Eric Berne diagnosed his personality: "he represents the child in all of us; he is egocentric and narcissistic, basically concerned with his own needs and demands".

We can all, at any age, lose control of the fickle child we still are. In that case, we would run the risk of becoming peter-panes, child-minded adults who shirk their responsibilities and pretend to adopt the carefree life of childhood.

In 1983 the Scottish psychologist Dan Kiley published a book with this degree scroll: "The Peter Pan syndrome, the person who never grows up". He coined this term and considered it a disorder (not pathological) of the personality development : the person refuses to assume the passage of time and to play an adult role.

 Peter Pan did not take notice of the result of these investigations, but the children of the tablet took good grade. Dialogue between grandfather and grandson:

-Do you want me to tell you the story of Peter Pan?

-Remember, Grandpa, you've already told it to me a bunch of times. Besides, it's outdated. I'd rather hear about the "Peter Pan Syndrome", which is what's cool nowadays. We could have a two-way discussion .

-In what book have you seen it?

- These current hot topics are only in the networks.

-Networks? What networks?

That night Grandpa spent it blankly consulting the Internet. After the next day's discussion he was very satisfied. The grandson was very considerate of him: "Grandpa, thank you for trying".

From that moment on, the grandfather forgot his prejudices towards the Internet and enrolled in a computer workshop. He needed to be on the same wavelength as his grandson.

What are the symptoms of older people suffering from Peter Pan syndrome? Among others, the following:

 -Gap between chronological age and affective maturity; anchored in childhood, they do not assume the responsibilities of adulthood.

-Immature personality that expresses itself in a presumptuous and arrogant way. This psychological armor hides insecurity, leave self-esteem, fear of loneliness and commitment. Adults who boast of partying, fun, seductive and liberated, are nothing more than "peter-panes" in disguise.

Blame others for their mistakes and expect from them all subject of care.

-Incapacity for true friendship; they are frivolous people who only have superficial and circumstantial friends.

Causes and prevention of Peter Pan Syndrome

The excessive idealization of a happy childhood invites to immortalize it; the painful memory of a childhood frustrated by lack of affection moves to recover it; having been an excessively pampered child creates a dependence that one does not want to break; a permissive Education , without demands, does not develop the capacity to overcome; a possessive love of the child keeps him in childhood ("I am very sorry he is getting older!").

Prevention requires the following: knowing how to detach affectively from children in a progressive way, so that they have experiences of acting freely; that parents educate their children for real life: that they face some problems on their own and get used to having responsibilities from agreement with their age. It is very harmful for them if their parents try to make them happy by keeping them in the fictitious and comfortable world of Neverland.

We must get them used to going out of themselves and thinking of others, concretizing it in details of service and generous behavior (for example, sharing a bag of sweets with their siblings and friends; lending the notes of class to a classmate who has been sick).

With these habits, the child will not resist growing up and will better face the transition to adolescence. On the other hand, without them, he would be an infantiloid and tyrannical adolescent with his parents, who would go from the old "How delicious you are, I would eat you! to "What a pity I didn't eat you in time!