"A person is falling in love with another when he has mortgaged his head and begins not to understand his project staff without it. And falling in love becomes love when that person becomes necessary for the other". Beyond a feeling, love has four characteristics that are housed within it: affectivity, intelligence, will and spirituality. These are some of the keys that Dr. Enrique Rojas Marcos, from the Spanish Psychiatric Research Centre high school , will give on workshop"Love and falling in love: 7 golden rules for living as a couple", which he will give together with Dr. Marian Rojas Estapé next Thursday, 23 September, in Pamplona. This event forms part of the activities of the International Symposium multidisciplinary on the Natural Recognition of Fertility, organised by the University of Navarra, at partnership with the University of the Andes (Chile) and the project Veritas Amoris.

What are the seven golden rules to make a couple work? "Love has a high percentage of psychological craftsmanship," says Dr Rojas and highlights three of them. "There has to be a speech The couple that argues a lot produces a great deterioration in the relationship and an enormous tiredness". Enrique Rojas advocates fleeing from the reproaches and grievances of the past and stresses the importance of learning to forgive: forgiveness is a great act of love that has two characteristics: one immediate, I forgive you; and another mediate, distant, which is the effort to forget. "Happiness in the love of a couple consists of having good health and bad report", he assures. 

In the opinion of this expert, one of the biggest problems of couples today is the lack of sentimental culture: there is a lot of information but there is a lack of training or affective culture, which means little development of emotional intelligence. The psychiatrist also points out that the pandemic and confinement have served to put the health of many couples at test .

"Fragile couples have become solid and others, those that were too weak, have broken up," he adds. Enrique Rojas refers to cohabitation as a laborious art, with many nuances. "It is the art of giving in and not turning a problem into a drama, and that requires psychological training . How does intelligence work in love? There are two keys: getting the affective choice right, finding the right person; and knowing how to get along with the other person, knowing their aptitudes, their limitations and accepting what cannot be changed".

To educate, to turn someone into a person

Among the most frequent reasons for crisis, Enrique Rojas perceives an evident lack of dialogue, not understanding and not putting oneself in the place of the other; an increasingly poor sexuality , not having a common project and not knowing how to educate children. "To educate is to turn someone into a person. It is to seduce with values that do not go out of fashion", he points out.

The multidisciplinary International Symposium on Natural Fertility Recognition will take place on 22-24 September. Speakers include, among others, Josep Standford (University of Utah, United States), Rene Leiva (University of Ontario, Canada), Christopher West (high school of Theology of the Body, United States), Juan José Pérez Soba (high school Pontifical John Paul II, Rome), René Écochard (Claude Bernard Lyon University, France), Marguerite Duane (Georgetown University, United States) and Monsignor Mario Iceta, Archbishop of Burgos and expert in bioethics.

The talks will begin at 3 p.m. and the workshops will be held in the morning. In addition to the one given by Dr. Rojas, attendees will be able to learn about the experience of business Wom Fertility, which uses artificial intelligence to promote women's reproductive health through a mobile application. There will also be an in memoriam ceremony for Dr. Gonzalo Herranz, an internationally renowned professor of bioethics who died in May this year.